Let's Fighting Love!

I love South Park.

So today is Friday.. woo hoo!!! I feel like I haven't gone out in TOO long so hopefully I will be able to make up for it this weekend. Things are going well. I'm still in love with the kids. This morning, Tijn gave me one of his lion kisses (him licking my cheek) which I have really missed and Pim has been giving me open-mouthed kisses all morning. It's kinda gross since he's sick and has been producing inexplicable amounts of snot but he's my little rock star and I don't mind.

The weather has been crap the last few days, as has been my health. However, today is GORGEOUS and I'm feeling much better! I was quite homesick this week as well as physically feeling like crap and wanting to be in bed all day. Nonetheless, I'm glad I pushed myself and that the week is overrrrrrr. Bring on Haarlem, Amsterdam and the beach, weather permitting.

Happy birthday kiki! (March 24th)
Happy birthday Panda Bear!!!! Love and miss you soooooooo much! (March 25th) Go wild and crazy this weekend honey bunny! I'll be taking shots in your name <3

you obviously haven't read my MySpace so how can you even pretend to know me?

I have been singing the internal playlist that plays endlessly in my head all dayyyyy and I have to say- I'm not hatin it. I'm no Celine or Christina but give me a good lace-front weave, personal trainer, and a voice synthesizer and I could be the next big thing. Not a big Beyonce/Sasha Fierce/whoever she is today fan but I love that halo song.. it's a lot less extra than her other shit (seriously, who does she think she is with that "Diva" song? Am I the only one who thinks she's trying way too damn hard?). I'm also getting more into Dutch music and currently love the song, "Skud Skuddem". GOOGLE IT.

I wish people from home would be on their computers when I am, HINT HINT*

I can't believe it's been almost 7 months since I've been out here. Sometimes it feels like time is creeping by but in actuality it's going so fast. Pretty soon I'll have to start making concrete decisions for my future, or something like that. Does it make sense that I haven't been feeling like myself lately, yet I feel the most like myself that I have in a while? I can't put my finger on it exactly but I feel like I finally have myself figured out. Granted, I still don't have the rest of my life completely figured out but I have figured out but I'm content with where I am and have my priorities in better order. I've sensed my maturity levels rising and me being less concerned/interested in things that used to consume my life. I'm not gonna say that I found myself because I was never really lost, but it's a lot clearer to me now the kind of person I am and want to continue to be and also the kind of people I want to surround myself with.

I have not had chicken wings in too long! I miss my mom's cooking and if I have one more sandwich, I might lose my friggin mind!

The next door neighbor is playing his piano and it sounds absolutely beautiful. I wish I was musically inclined, besides my phenomenal singing voice. I started to teach myself the piano but I could only play by ear and really didn't have the patience at the time. I wish the family had a piano. If I can't break into the music business as an entertainer, I could rely on my numb-chucking and songwriting skills.

ManBearPig

Way too much has happened in the weeks that I've been computerless. I won't even begin to try and go into detail but I'll sum it up by saying it's been great fun and when I find the time to upload pictures, I'll let them do the talking.

computerless & dying.

the title says it all.
It's been TWO WEEKS.
I don't think I have the strength to go on.

good vibrations..*

I'm in a particularly good mood and have been all week so I'll share my moment of joy with all you fascinated readers! I can't pinpoint any one reason to explain my happiness but I just feel like I'm finally in a place in my life where I'm comfortable and content. I haven't been letting anything get me down and have really put a positive attitude in full effect. Corny as it sounds, it really does work. Moments of frustration have been almost non-existent this week and I'm really just in a good place.

My time with the kids has been amazing; I had a pretty relaxing weekend and have been getting a lot of rest each day which really helps with my enthusiasm and energy. I'm really excited about tomorrow because I get to spend most of it with Pim! The family leaves for Switzerland Friday and everything still needs to be packed. Pimmy loves going for walks so I'm actually looking forward to spending time with him. I just hope it's nice weather. He's getting so much better at walking and has been in such a fantastic mood! He's such a sweet little baby.

Niek packed a suitcase full of toys to take with him last night and he's been carrying it around with him ever since! It's so cute because I think it weighs more than him and when he runs to try and keep up with the others, he struggles so much. For such a tiny kid with small hands, he manages to come downstairs every morning with about 15 dinos. I love him.

Lara had trouble sleeping about a month ago while I was babysitting so I let her come look at pictures on my computer. That wasn't the best idea because now she wants to do it all the time, but I find it quite nice. It's one of the few times we get to spend alone together and she'll sit on my lap and point out the pictures she thinks are funny. She even lets me tuck her in after which I also enjoy :-)

Tijn, Tijn, Tijn. I really love him a lot. He has this cute little baby voice he does, where he'll speak about himself in the third person. He will randomly come sit on my lap, give me a hug, or give me a kiss and I always wanna hold him and never let go. He is the absolute sweetest.

I'm really happy with the way things are going for me right now. I love my home environment. Thomas and Eline are really sweet and I look forward to our dinnertime conversations. I can talk to them about my day, my US home-life, anything and I think that really helps me to not be homesick. I really feel like they care about me and want me to be happy (THIS IS THE SAPPIEST POST EVER) but I really do feel lucky because I lucked out with this family; it doesn't always work out this way.

In other news, my parents are in the process of adopting a niece of mine from Haiti. I think it's wonderful cuz she's Matt's age and now he'll have someone to play with. Also, if I really do end up staying here, I'll be comforted knowing that he won't be alone. I miss him.


vanavond, slaap lekker!!!

hey, is your vagina clean?

So I can't believe how marvelous Barcelona was. My post post title ins one of the many hysterical quotes from the vacation. I had such an amazing time with my sister, met the most amazing people and did insane amounts of partying. It was in all seriousness, the best vacation I've ever had and my only wish was that it could've lasted longer.

Damaly arrived on Thursday morning and we were so happy to see each other, that we actually shed tears (if you know us, you know they're rare). We then went straight to Amsterdam with Lizzy where we cleaned up then hit the shops! There were all sorts of sales and I took her to Wok to Walk which is hands-down, my favorite place to eat. That night we went out in Amsterdam to some anti-fashion party before waking Friday morning to start our true journey to Barcelona!!! We flew out of Dusseldorff, Germany and arrived in Barcelona around 3:30 PM. The weather was surprisingly warm and my heavy winter jacket was completely unnecessary. We stayed at Kabul Hostel which was fantastic! They made up for the lack of outlets in the rooms with an insanely fun lounge area that had all the characteristics of a bar. We met the most wonderful Romanian girl named Andreea, because she too was searching the hostel for an outlet (we found each other in the laundry room where we tried to unplug a machine so we could plug in our flat irons; it didn't fit so we unplugged a vending machine instead).

Showing is better than telling so I won't bore you with too many details but I will say that Barcelona is definitely the type of place I'd love to visit several more times, if not live there. Besides gross Spanish men grabbing my ass, it's a beautiful city with so much to see and do.
















The day after we got back was my 23rd birthday! Ewwwwwww, I'm getting soooo old! I spent the day showing my sister around my neighborhood and introducing her to my peoples. The family was kind enough to get me some birthday gifts and the kids were so sweet and cute.. Damaly definitely fell in love. We then ventured out into Haarlem where we met up with all the girls and I proceeded to get RIDICULOUSLY drunk. How drunk you ask? Drunk enough to pass out on the toilet, forcing an employee to come take the doors off the hinges since I wasn't responding to the banging. I remember taking a cab home but I don't remember falling asleep in front of my front door while Damaly slept in the bakfiets (it's a popular bike here with a big wooden basket meant for transporting children). Anyidrankwaytoomuch, we awoke at 530 AM, trying in vain to get the door open. We eventually had to ring the bell and my host family was not happy. I ended up sleeping until 10:30 which was also frowned upon before having to bring Damaly to the airport. Sad face for days. I miss her so much already. Having her here really made my life and I'm extremely grateful that she was able to come.






Things with the family are going great. I had great conversations with Thomas and Eline about how things were going and improvements that could be made on both ends. I don't think I'll be joining them to Switzerland anymore because it would be a good time to finally see different places in Holland as well as have some more time to myself. The kids are doing well; they're so sweet and so cute and I really do enjoy spending time with them.

my heart is hurting.

I'm so tired & hungover.
Damaly went home today.
I miss her already.
All I have now are our memories
Happy belated birthday to me.

I have no energy now but I'll discuss Barcelona soon.

I was tryna give some advice, sista to sista.. come, come.. be a part of this

So in a few short hours, I will be on my way to the airport to pick up Damaly! I doubt I will get any sleep tonight because I can't sleep when I'm excited or anxious. I can't believe it's been 5 MONTHS since I've seen her!!!!!!! I really don't think I can live without her in my life. If it wasn't for her visiting, I don't know if I would've survived (totally being over-dramatic but she's like my aorta.. I NEED her). I'll try to write a more substantial post before I go but I got a big day tomorrow. We're going to go to Home Depot. Yeah, buy some wallpaper, maybe get some flooring, stuff like that. Maybe Bed, Bath, & Beyond, I don't know, I don't know if we'll have enough time...

dag!!!

severe case of the Mondays..

As I'm sure you can guess from the title, I'm not a particular fan of Mondays. I hate coming off of fabulous weekends then being bombarded with the same meticulous routines and tired excuses. Of course I'm excited that my sister arrives this week but it doesn't help that I forgot that we're 6 hours ahead over here so she actually won't arrive until THURSDAY morning. UGH. These next few days will be the hardest as I'm sure my patience will be further tested. Sometimes I really want to stop being an au pair because I think I'd enjoy Europe much more if I was doing something else. Right now is definitely one of those times. Don't get me wrong, it has its perks but I often find myself having a hard time making the positives outweigh the negatives.

I can't seem to figure out why today is so important...

Oh yea, the first Black US President was inaugurated today. I can go on and on about what a great speaker Barack is and how I genuinely believe he will follow through on the changes he seeks to make, but in contrast, I'm fully aware that it will in NO WAY be easy. But all he asked for is hope and I got that.

[Not that it matters to me anyway since I want to stay in Europe for 12 more years but that's neither here nor there].

Anyway, here's a link to his speech. He truly is one of the best orators and most articulate President we've had in a while (don't get me started with Bushisms).

http://www.reuters.com/article/topNews/idUKTRE50J5PS20090120?virtualBrandChannel=10112

The following is one of my favorite excerpts. I love his realism, simplicity, and conviction:

"Today I say to you that the challenges we face are real. They are serious and they are many. They will not be met easily or in a short span of time. But know this, America - they will be met.

On this day, we gather because we have chosen hope over fear, unity of purpose over conflict and discord.

On this day, we come to proclaim an end to the petty grievances and false promises, the recriminations and worn out dogmas, that for far too long have strangled our politics.

We remain a young nation, but in the words of Scripture, the time has come to set aside childish things. The time has come to reaffirm our enduring spirit; to choose our better history; to carry forward that precious gift, that noble idea, passed on from generation to generation: the God-given promise that all are equal, all are free, and all deserve a chance to pursue their full measure of happiness.

In reaffirming the greatness of our nation, we understand that greatness is never a given. It must be earned. Our journey has never been one of short-cuts or settling for less. It has not been the path for the faint-hearted - for those who prefer leisure over work, or seek only the pleasures of riches and fame. Rather, it has been the risk-takers, the doers, the makers of things - some celebrated but more often men and women obscure in their labor, who have carried us up the long, rugged path toward prosperity and freedom"

I can tell from the many European people that have bombarded me with Obama questions that he's well supported here; let's hope we can say the same for Americans.

Also, enjoy Beyonce being all extra & over-dramatic for one of my favorite songs, "At Last" by the great Etta James. I didn't really like her version.. you could tell she was vying for the spotlight and trying to be all "soulful" but I think the song is better song softer, with less vibrato, hair flips, and man-voice. They should've got Christina Aguilera to do it cuz she did it way better or even Mariah Carey.. she's half Black.

a year ago... I'da body-slammed you*

I don't have much time but I wanna stay true to my word about frequent posts so here's a quick update: There are exactly 2 WEEKS left before my sister arrives!! Tomorrow is Lizzy's birthday so be on the look out for new pictures of us, cute and put together at first, and progressively looking worse/being outta control/and behaving inappropriately. You're welcome.

Prague is a definite so the month of February will be quite adventurous as I'll be going to 3 different countries in 3 weeks!

I also passed my Dutch exam and qualified to advance to the next stage! Seeing as how I was always exhausted and had serious ADD during most of the classes, ik ben trots op ik! (that's probably a poorly constructed sentence but basically, I'm damn proud of myself). I really do want to get better at the language though becausssseeeee, I'm seriously considering staying! The American economy is shit right now and it'd probably be much easier for me to get a job out here. I wouldn't even mind if it was some sort of secretarial job, as long as I could make enough for rent and to travel. A year here is not long enough for me to go to all the places I want to see. I think I need to give Europe another year or two.

more later, tot ziens!

if you're happy & you know it, clap your hands!

This week was really wonderful. Things with the family went smoothly and I was still coming off my high from spending New Year's in Paris. Also, having everything all set for my sister when she gets here really took a load off of my shoulders because I like to have things taken care of well in advanced. For a moment, we weren't sure if she was even still coming out, given the terribleness of the American economy but she cleared everything with her job and everytime I think of seeing her lovely face at 8 AM at the airport, I lose my breath with excitement.

I had a fabulous night out with the girls on Friday, where we were ALL ridiculously drunk and even though I didn't get home til 6:30 AM, I'm very happy to report that I DID NOT fall off my bike! Here are a few pics I stole from Jaime since I didn't have my camera. My favorite is the one of me scraping myself off the ground after having fallen off my bike in the rain. Alcohol is great.
**Any potential future employers, disregard the pictures of the girl who looks like me on the pole... it's really my alter ego Emma Spruce****








Saturday, I dined with several au pairs, one of which is leaving to return home to Australia next Sunday. It was super leuk to be around so many girls from different backgrounds and I even discovered that au pairs can also live out! I love the family I work for now but I would definitely have preferred to live with other au pairs.. I like being able to go downstairs in my pajamas and not having to travel back & forth but it would also be nice to be able to leave work at work, not have to tiptoe, or need clearance for having people over. If I had the option before I began I would've taken it, but I'm happy living here and I like feeling close to the family (except the not having a door thing) so it's all good.

Sunday I hung out with Rems and his family and I did a little skating since all the water around here was frozen. There were so many people out enjoying it (it doesn't always get cold enough for the water to freeze) and I snapped some cool pics of the scenery. I also threw in some pics of Niek in his raider (knight) costume:

we gettin A-RAB money

ummmm, I wish. Had I A-RAB money, I certainly wouldn't be wiping any baby bottoms.

2009 has gotten off to a great start (minus me being deathly ill.. I have a burning cough that hurts so much, it makes me wanna hold my coughs in) and these next few weeks are looking pretty busy/awesome for me. As I've been writing about for the past 873 months, my sister comes in LESS THAN 3 WEEKS!!!! She arrives on Wednesday, the 28th. I'll be at the airport with Eline, Niek and Pim to pick her up and I may pass out with happiness. We booked our trip to BARCELONA, SPAIN this week and she's so excited so that makes me even more excited. I love her so much.

Any20moredays, she'll spend her first day here either sleeping or hanging out with the kids and me. I'd like to have a nice dinner here then head out for dessert/drinks in Haarlem with all the girls. Thursday, I'd like to take her into Amsterdam to see all the historical shit but more importantly, THE SHOPS. We can then come back home, hang out more with the kids, shower, pack, have dinner then head back into Amsterdam to solicit the RLD, coffee shops and maybe this new club Bitter Zoet I've been hearing so much about. We'll probably spend the night at Lizzy's and from there catch the train in the morning to Dusseldorf, Germany where we'll have a few drinks before 11 AM then board the plane to Barcelonaaaaaaaa! Ahhhhhh!!!

2 weeks after that I'm going skiing with the family in the Swiss Alps! I don't know why I ended that sentence with an exclamation point because there is nothing exciting about being in a van with 4 small children for 12+ hours. Oh and the whole not-being-able-to-ski thing may put a damper on the vacation as well. Keep your fingers crossed that I don't break my neck!

I may also be going to Prague the first weekend of February, if possible, which would be awesome! I've heard it's a bitchin place to be and I found a night train that would take us there for 58 euro!

In other news, there's this cool dance style I'm trying to teach myself that's really big in France. I think it's so fetch and I can't wait to try it in public. Observe the following:
I LOVE the song and the dancing! I'm so excited to try this and I'll be sure to get it on video so you all can see my awesome moves.

The kids are doing well. Pim is so spoiled now.. he wants to be held all the time and cries/flips out when you try and put him down. He was probably held all of vacation and now he's used to it but he's still pulling himself up and he's been in such a cute, giggly mood. I wish he would improve on his crawl (he's doing it military style, dragging his legs behind him) and I wish he'd sit up on his own. Niek is still Niek; still so cute, still a bit naughty, still irresistible. We've been getting along great and sometimes I just wanna eat him up! Tijn is still the sweetest kid ever but he's had some trouble listening this week and has cried/been punished a lot. Lara is still crying a lot. I've noticed that she does it mostly when Thomas is here so it's obviously for attention. She knows exactly what she's doing and how to spin things to make herself the victim, something kids are always very good at. It's weird with her because we get along for the most part but when Thomas is around, everything I do makes her cry/sulk/whine/pout. Regardless, I'm not going to treat her any differently than I do the others but I wish she'd be sweet all the time.

Still no update on the status of my Visa but let's hope I hear some good news soon!

tu parles francais?

Ok, so more about my vacation and this Paris place.

I spent Christmas Eve with Rems and his family, where I prepared a delicious roasted chicken dinner with mashed potatoes, green bean casserole and hot chocolate sauce served with an assortment of fruits for dessert. Het was zooooo lekker! The next night, his brother prepared a smoked salmon salad, baked fish, and vegetables which ik ook het lekker gevondt (I have no idea if that's grammatically correct but whatever). The day after that, I continued my lekker-eating streak by dining at Jaime's host family's house where I inhaled duck, french fries, some divine alcoholic cauliflower concoction and homemade tiramisu. Rems stayed over and the next morning we started on our adventure to Paris!!!!!

We drove there Saturday morning with no traffic and beautiful sunny weather. I managed to stay awake for at least 3 of the hours (it took us about 5) and was pleasantly surprised that our hotel in Irvy Sur Seine wasn't a rat-hole. The city is about 10 minutes south of Paris by car, 5 by RER. We were literally down the street from the train station

*****Sidenote: our 2nd day there, we didn't know where we were going so Rem's suggested we use the TomTom (navigation system) to find our way. It seemed like a good idea. When we went outside, I looked down the street and said I thought I could see the station. Being a man, Remco insisted I was wrong and that we should follow the TomTom. Needless to say, we walked for about 25 minutes, making U-turns and passing things that looked familiar to us from walking around the city the day before since the stupid thing was giving us car directions!!! In the end, I'd been correct; the station was literally 5 minutes down the street. MEN.*****

Anyihaveagoodsenseofdirection, we saw quite a lot. There was so much to see and you couldn't take an ugly picture. Here are some from various places like the Arc, Grand Palais, the Eiffel, the scenery, and a buncha other places I forget the names of and ME:
















I had a fantastic time with Rems, who was a great travel partner. We got to do things at a leisurely pace and he also appreciated the beauty of Paris. I would've liked to party more and I know it would've been a different experience with someone more outgoing or with the girls. We would both like to go again, but at a warmer time of year. Paris is really huge and I'm sure it'd be even more beautiful and enjoyable if we didn't have to be all bundled up.

My sister officially gets here in 21 days and we're both so excited! We're going to celebrate our birthdays (technically just hers because we'll be back in Holland for mine) in Barcelona! I haven't seen her in too long and knowing that she's coming is the main reason I haven't felt as homesick. I know we're going to have a blast and I can't wait to see her!! I'm going to tackle the shit outta her at the airport and be depressed for a month after she leaves.